Yes, I have this uncanny talent to come up with tempting titles that will grab you by your balls and then force feed you some mediocre story or escapade. Yes, I know the title isn’t tempting and no, am not going to surprise you with an excellent story either. So fuck you.
So, this morning I logged on to Facebook, and saw Anurag Kashyap jerking off and cumming all over my timeline. Angry posts to funny ones, from demands to freedom of expression to freedom of creativity, from the right to see everything and the right to show what they want to show (I, once, did suggest this to a girl on Skype but she blocked me) and this Gujju friend has written an open letter starting with ‘Bhen ke l@d#’ to Nihalani who apparently ‘censors’ everything. (Moments when Irony starts molesting itself)
I usually don’t get into social commentary (and no sir, my stupid jokes on social media is not social commentary although it has come to that) but I just wanted to write down my not so poignant thoughts on this outrage against the censor board. First of all, what the Fuck are we outraging about? Are we angry that the censor board asked Anurag Kashyap to edit out things that it thought was offensive and could possibly be a cause of another outrage (I meant the real outrage where buses are burnt and people are injured unlike the social media outrage where we become stray dogs and chase every car that passes just to entertain ourselves) or are we angry that Anurag Kashyap thinks that his freedom to express is being curbed or are we angry that we will not get to see what Anurag wants us to see (and if I am to believe this ex Phantom employee, Anurag likes to see more than he shows) or are we just outraging because that is what everyone else is doing? (And yes, nincompoops trying to push ‘Voice of the People’ philosophy down my throat should know that I don’t believe in the voice of the people but I do believe in #trends #FreeContentForSocialMediaWebsites, #FreePRForBrandsAndPeople and #PublicityStunts so fuck you for that too.)
Let me understand (rather pretend to) this scenario.
A guy spends money, makes a movie and goes to another set of guys, who are authorised by a system, to get it approved. Or even simply put, a guy makes a product for a market and takes it to the body which is responsible and authorised to approve or reject or suggest changes to the product before it hits the market and the criteria is clearly stated in the rule book. I repeat, the Rule Book.
So the body feels that the product is not up to the mark as per the ‘rules’ set by the system to be sent out in the market. So, the guy gets all pissed off and decides to go all donkey dick on the body. What I don’t understand is why is the guy angry at the body instead of being angry at the ‘Rule Book’ or the system.
Anurag has the right to be unhappy (I almost used the word deserves) and cross and should definitely be fuming but that should be directed towards the boring and retarded terms and conditions laid down by the system in place instead of the person or group of people who are doing their job.
Anurag has spent a lot of money to create something interesting and provoking, to sell it and therefore it is his right to fight but he is barking against the wrong tree. What is more funny is that ‘the people’ are angry about Anurag’s rights to express being curtailed even without knowing what his rights, wrong or fantasies are.
He is right when he says that ‘Udta Punjab’ is one of the most honest movies and anybody or any political opposing it is supporting ‘Drugs’. And he further adds that it is his fight and he doesn’t want any ‘AAP or Congress’ to support him. Three things, a) It is a bit of an irony because despite your claim that the movie being an honest one, you are not. Quick reminder, you openly supported use of weed while being part of the movie ‘Bom’ and featured in it as well. Even I think weed is alright but you know what I mean ‘oh honest man’. b) nobody is opposing ‘Udta Punjab’ but as mentioned above someone authorised to do so has asked him to edit the product. c) By naming political parties and slyly pointing it as a BJP vs You fight, you have just made it all the more political which just shows what your intent is.
Irrelevant but I think some of the Indian porn movies are honest too ~Shakeela Chechi Pranamam~ you know, with the sex in dark to unsatisfied marriages and infidelity (the story line most of the times) but when they go to the certifying body, the sex is cut out and all we see of ample cleavage and hear abundant moans. So anybody deleting those scenes are opposing sex and the basic need of a human being. You know what I mean. No?
But then I do feel that we do have the right to watch what we want to or create what we want as an individuals. I do understand that there is a need for reform because I think the rights and wrongs set by society are irrelevant in the present times. So, if there should be a fight, it has to be against the norms, rules and the don’ts instead of people who are in someway doing what they have been asked to do or are following the rules.
Like a wise man once said, “It is easy to make a noise but it takes a lot of thinking to create music.” But it takes little or no thinking to end something meaningless with an even more meaningless quote.